Are you Worthy of Success?
December 15, 2020
Are you Worthy of Success?
Here’s a thought for you “Am I creating the life I want or am I creating the opposite because I’m afraid of failure?”
For years I didn’t believe I was worthy. I can see it so clearly now but when I was in it, it wasn’t ever a conscious thought process. I wasn’t cruel to myself like so many of us are. And I didn’t tell myself I didn’t deserve it. It was more of a quiet resigning myself to accepting that “This is all you get Lauren.”
I grew up with a lot of trauma and plenty of fears.
And they kept me utterly hopeless, hiding from all the possibilities that life had to offer. I felt I was worthless and because of that, in my heart I ‘knew’ that if I reached out, I would fail…at whatever I tried. So I kept myself small.
Being bold and gutsy and chasing the things I REALLY want didn’t happen overnight for me.
I’ve fallen plenty of times but the failures and slips have never been my focus.
From the day I decided that I no longer wanted to feel lonely, invisible and shy. From the moment I understood that it was a decision I got to make for myself, it has been a long road but that initial moment of realisation was all it took to sway the keel of this ship, even by just a few millimetres, and change the course of my life dramatically.
It’s not about huge life changing overhauls and it’s certainly got nothing to do with external factors. Your success depends on subtle shifts and changes in your mindset and what you believe about yourself.
When you believe in yourself, you no longer see failure in it’s classic sense but more like a learning opportunity. It doesn’t have to consume you and instead can propel you forwards, towards your success.
There is no one way to success, there are many and each path will come with it’s fair share of failures but if you set off with a renewed approach, one where failure is something to be welcomed then you will leap and bound along that path inviting all that comes your way, knowing that whatever happens ‘You got this!’
How great would it be to feel this way?
So how do you find out if you have these blocks yourself? I certainly wasn’t aware for a very long time but I began to notice it once I started plotting my goals. I started to put some serious thought into what I wanted my life to look like in the years to come. The house I wanted to live in, the trips I wanted to go on, the life experiences and emotional experiences I wanted to have, the things I wanted to own.
There were things that I wanted, and I mean REALLY deep down wanted, that when I thought about having them generated this strange niggly feeling. I soon identified it as a sense of resistance. Resistance to my goals…you can imagine my surprise. But what’s more surprising is that so many of us have it!
If you have resistance to the things you really want then there is a little exploration that needs to be done. This resistance can show up in a number of ways; self doubt, lack of belief in your abilities, self sabotaging behaviours, perfectionism and procrastination. These are all things that get in the way of your dreams, but you may not be able to spot them until you start thinking about what you really want.
So I urge you to think about what success really means to you, what does it look like. Visualisation is a powerful tool for getting you to your goals but it’s also a great way to uncover what holds you back because you have to start with knowing what you really want and then by asking yourself, why am I not there yet?
As with all the work I do, I encourage compassion and curiosity in this exercise rather than self flogging! Taking responsibility for your actions is empowering but taking blame is counter productive so just work with what you have and move forward with what you’ve learned.
Remember it all starts with your mindset.
Big Love, Lauren xxx